Of course!

Things have been going pretty well around here lately. As well as can be expected in this house anyway! Cadince is doing fine with her little broken collar bone...she hardly ever has her brace on the way it should be and climbs around EVERYWHERE as usual. I figure if she isn't in enough pain to stop herself then no harm done letting her play. Cecilia is pulling off average grades in school, better than the low grades she started off with but not quite the higher grades she COULD be getting if she would stop talking in class and do her work...so she is pretty much grounded all the time lately. Ciara is becoming very excited about the arrival of her little brother and wants so much to help with everything....the nursery, the baby book, rubbing Mommy's tummy.... anything she feels contributes to preparing for Chase. To her, this will get him here sooner!
Speaking of which....

Here we go....This is why I labeled this "Of course!"
Today I had an appointment in Nashville with the specialist, a different one then usual this time, to get an echogenic test done for Chase. This is basically and extensive ultrasound done mainly on the heart and surrounding arteries and valves. The tech spent the whole time zoomed in on his heart and than the prenatal heart specialist came in to scan for a bit and examine what he could of the heart. No worries here, everything about Chase's little heart was perfect! That is a BIG blessing!
However, the Lord finds humor in my topsy turvy world I swear, and the next thing the tech needed to do was a transvaginal to measure my cervix and some growth. Two seconds into the scan she started getting that "huh" look on her face. I was then informed that there was a not so small issue...my cervix had shortened 12 cm in the past month and a half (which is NOT ok) and I was now at a very short 22 cm! Oh Joy!
My friend was with me abd we had plans to go pre Christmas shopping and browsing after the appointment, but instead I was immediately sent over to Centennial Hospital for Women to be hooked up to machines and monitored! Great! I tried to tell the lady that I wasn't in labor, nor was I even contracting, but no one listens to me. I was, indeed, not contracting and was released shortly after I got there, but all of this came with bad news.
Chase will be here soon, alot sooner than we thought, alot sooner than he should be... 3-5 weeks. I am 29 weeks and 4 days as of today...
So....
Please pray for us. Please pray that my son will stay inside just a little longer, that there will be no complications, that he will be safe inside of me, and that when he is born he will not have to stay in the hospital NICU for days and days like Cadince did. My heart breaks when I think about not bringing him home, when I think about not being able to hold my son for weeks for mor than a minute or two before they have to stick him back in the incubator, when I think about not being able to nurse him like I want to so badly. Everything was fine! I haven't been to the E.R. in awhile, no bad contractions, just growing pains... I don't understand why this happens, I just ask that you help me and pray that we ALL get through this healthy and happy.
I have to add something positive to stop myself from crying anymore while I write this =)
We have all the big furniture we need for the nursery!!!! And it is all set up!!! We want to paint and are just waiting on approval from the owner of our house to start! We found a crib, dresser, and changing table/dresser combo all for $250 gently used from a very nice woman! I got an adorable bassinet for super cheap from a consignment store, and I got his baby swing on sale too! I need diapers of course, bottles, a breast pump, and tons of other little things for his actual arrival, and I feel so unprepared now...but that's me worrying! ugh!

Thank you all for all your prayers! We will get through, we always do...

First Broken Bone among the kiddos!

So.... Wednesday, the 4th, Cadince was in the middle of practicing her new acrobatic routine (she is secretly a tight rope walker) when her balance was thrown off by a sudden movement of the CHAIR she was standing on! Her tiny little body was thrust forward behind the chair and she fell down, down, down many feet (like 3 1/2) and she landed with a THUD! on the floor! (I try to tell her everytime she needs to use a safety net!) I was in bed because I sleep whenever I get the chance and Jared rushed her into me, quickly explained her terrifying feat, and moved her sleeve to show me the puffy bruised area on her collar bone. After examining it for a few moments I decided she was probably just bruised and decided to get back to my nap...I am a very involved mother! LOL A few moments later I could hear her cries from the other room. I got up to check o her and she had barely moved her arm but was obviously in a great deal of pain...to the emergency room I guess! Well, after 1 hour of Gateway's "excellent service" and being exposed to swine flu and all sorts of other ailments from the other people waiting around in the waiting room, we were called back. The doctor came in, looked at her, moved her arm around, and sent her to X-ray. For those of you mothers who have not had to experience your young child being tortured in a X-ray room, may you never have to! She was TERRIFIED! I tried desperately to hold her hand but they kept pulling her away and bending her in ways obviously causing anguish! She kept screaming and through the tears I heard "Mama, I am scared! Help me!" Let me say I have NEVER felt so helpless and so horrible in my life! My poor baby was right in front of me, calling for me, in pain and I could not help her. After the great fun in the Xray room, we were sent back to our room to wait....and wait...and wait. Well, another 3 hours went by and we were finally seen again by the doctor, all the while my little Cadie was cuddled up against me sobbing in discomfort. He told us she had a clean break in her collar bone and, yes, there is nothing we can do to fix it! He said he would give her some medicine there, but she was to take just Motrin at home, and wear a sling for 6-8 weeks! She is 3!!!! So, after all the tears we both cried during our 4 1/2 hour stay at the hospital, Cadince and I walked out to the car where Daddy and Ciara were waiting to tell them the news... My poor poor Cadince! The smallest of us all gets a big boo boo! To top it all off, our cell phones were shut off that morning so I couldn't call to cancel my doctor's appt for the 3rd time to take Cadie to the E.R.!! Crazy Crazy day!

Halloween 2009

We had a GREAT Halloween this year! Our church had a chili cook-off, American Idol, Trunk or Treat, an AWESOME hayride, fireworks, and some of our favorite people... the Spencer family! The girls got to go all out this year! Cecilia picked to be a Queen bee, though she mostly looks like a super hero in her pictures! Ciara was the belle of the ball as a Southern Belle and won the all ages costume contest at the LDS church function and got 2nd place at our church's festival! Cadince, our Cadie bug, was a cute little lady bug and the most adorable one I have ever seen at that! So, here are some pictures of our little cuties. I have to say, though it may seem biased some, I have the most adorable children in the world. Truthfully, I don't thank the Lord often enough for them and He deserves ALOT of praise for the little wonders He has blessed Jared and I with!



All my girls... Cadie smearing her face paint! Aren't they the cutest?!






























One thing is for sure... we will NEVER run out of Halloween candy! Here's our stash from Halloween night alone... and this is AFTER we passed out some to the late trick or treaters who came around after we got home!!!

Baby shower

So... Saturday was my baby shower and it was amazing! I had so much fun with friends and family and couldn't have asked for a better turn out...well, Andrea, it would have been nice if you hadn't thrown yourself infront of some crazy teenager and gotten in that accident so you couldn't come for it, but I understand your selfishness I suppose! lol Anyway, I want to thank everyone who made it out to make me feel all special and thought I would go ahead and post some pics for those who couldn't get there (because of some fake "car accident" or whatever) haha jk



I really was in a good mood, but this picture makes me look hateful! lol... I was cooking!










Before the party started everyone was just hanging out...so I was forced to pose for pictures!













Not that Chase woudn't look so muc better in these, but I think I pulled the look off ok, right?!










I was so in love with all the little bags! Loved my gifts, don't get me wrong, but I got all giggly over them bags! lol










Some gifts brought out the tear works... Cecilia picked out a bunch of stuff from her and her sisters just for Chase. She chose some diapers, Finding Nemo baby wipes, an outfit, and s baby pacifier thermometer so she can read the temperature when she helps with Chase. Right before that I had finally stopped crying from when Tabby walked in with the cutest little carseat! She surprised me! It is adorable! Laura R got these precious little hand/footprint frames for me to hang up in Chase's room! Holding those just made me think of how small his little feet will be and I just want to hold him already! lol



























Of course, every good shower has a super yummy cake to gorge out on! lol. My Mommy got me the cutest little cake. In case you can't read it it says "It's a Boy!" She said she asked, but they couldn't fit "finally" on there anywhere! hahahaha













Here I am, stuffing the adorable cake into my mouth! mmmmm! It was so good!











Last but not least I wanted to show the world exactly what all happened at the shower and I could not do wo without including this next picture! My husband, who was NOT invited to the shower by the way, snuck down the stairs during the gift time to swipe a bunch of food from the kitchen and then sneak back up stairs... well, all I can say Jared is... BUSTED!














I feel so incredibly blessed to have the friends and family that I do who took time out of their busy lives to spend some time with me, pampering me and playing insane games! With all the chaos that has been associated with this pregnancy, it was so nice to just be surrounded by people who really care about us and feel that support! Thank all of you so much and please know that I love you all for everything you do! We had a blast didn't we?!



* On a side note, I did want to add, not to bring the mood down at all, that I did have another ultrasound with the specialist Friday. Apparently we have a bit of a road ahead still of tests and ultrasounds to rule out other possiblities, but we are pretty sure Chase has clubbed foot and there is a possibility of some brain abnormaility. From the looks of the ultrasound the doctor believes that the left side of his brain appears larger than the right and so she is just a little concerned about that. She has scheduled me for an advanced echo for his heart and a measurements ultrasound in a few weeks to get a better look! We are hopeful though... please pray everything is ok! The Lord will get us through just fine! Thanks!

motivational in my very hectic life

My mom sent me this email story and it undoubtedly touched my heart so much. I have been building a stronger relationship with the Lord these past few months, unfortunate that it took such a horrid probability (the possible health problems with our son) to finally get my butt in gear towards this transformation, but whatever the reason I have matured so much in this short while and have been "blessed" with trials and tribulations already to build up that faith and relationship even more lately.
I hope that as you read this short story you feel the spirit rush over you as I did.
For, the Lord only gives us what we can handle and he will not weigh upon us that which we can not carry. He might try :) but he knows our limits!


Here's the story:

I was tired. Bone weary. For six weeks, my schedule had been relentless. In the middle of it all I had been faced with one tragedy after another: the accidental death of a young woman in our church; the loss of a close friend to heart disease; the breakup of a loved one's marriage. I was beginning to feel like Job.
One Wednesday night at prayer meeting, the strain must have showed on my face. After the service, Tom Parrish walked up to me and put his hand on my shoulder. I knew he had something important to say. Tom is eighty yeas old. A survivor of Pearl Harbor, he has been a lawyer, a pastor and university administrator. He is a man of wisdom and experience. I have learned to listen to him.

"Scott," Tom began, "let me tell you a story about something that happened to me in high school. I was strong and lean back then, and very fast. I ran the mile on the track team, but I was having problems. I always led the pack through the first three-and -a -half laps, but on the homestretch I was getting beat. One day after I lost by a whisker, my track coach pulled me over and said a single sentence that changed my life: 'Always remember that the other man is just as tired as you are.'

"Now, Scott, you haven't said it, but I can tell it: You're tired. But this is the moment when you must not give in. Just remember that others have gone through what you're going through, and they didn't lose the race. And they were as tired as you are. Keep your chin up and keep running."
There are times when all of us need to collapse and rest. There are other times when we need to tighten our jaw and "keep on keeping on." And sometimes the encouragement of a friend can make all the difference between winning or losing the race.

Dear Father, may I continue to run the race that is before me. And may I give encouragement to other runners along the way. Scott Walker

Are we an encourager or discourager? May God help us to be like Jesus. Have a Great day in the Lord!

Differences

So, I have been keeping a small record of what has been going on during the pregnancy through the blog, not really keeping up the way I should, but attempting to keep some record... Anyway, my Mom suggested I keep track of the differences between this pregnancy and the other two, since we have a boy this time... and believe me, there are differences! lol

First Trimester

With the girls, I was sick throughout the entire pregnancy. With Ciara I was actually physically ill, vomiting all the time, everything but what I was craving! With Cadince, I was just nauseous 24/7! I couldn't eat anything even if I wanted to, but once I did I had the constant feeling of nausea, with no relief! With Chase, however, I had early morning nausea through the first whole trimester, occasionally it was throughout the entire day but mostly in the morning or late late evening. It was always accompanied by vomiting! lol

Second Trimester

Into the second trimester, with both Ciara and Cadince, I was laid up in bed, still ill! My body stayed fairly small, however, and my weight gain was minimal. With Chase, my feet swell, my legs and hands swell, and my weight gain has been average, but not where I would like it to be! Because with Ciara I started out so small, I only gained about 18 lbs with her over all 9 months. With Cadince, since she was 7 weeks early, I only gained about 24 lbs, but at 33 weeks that was a good deal more than what I had gained with Ciara. After Cadie I didn't lose all of my weight, and started out at an unideal weight with Chase... 155 lbs! So far, in the second trimester, nearly to the third with Chase, I have gained 20 lbs... and I still have 15 weeks to go! I have just now been put on light bed rest, with orders to prop my feet up as often as possible and avoid any straining exercise or movements. Great! I have 3 kids! lol By this point , 25 weeks, in my previous 2 pregnancies, I had been to the hospital quite a few times with preterm labor scares, had to have terbutaline shots out the whazoo, and was incapable of doing anything on my own! haha! With Chase, I have been twice, only because an infection has caused me to go into heavier Braxton Hicks than permissible, and that has thrown me over and required me to have the terb!

Kicking

Ciara was my first and so, I wasn't exactly a pro on what to look for movement wise. I first felt her kicks around 19-20 weeks and they were like little butterfly movements! I felt the same feeling with Cadie around the same time, only a little more profound, since the girls were only a year apart! With Chase, I felt the butterflies at about 16 weeks, way before I expected them. At 20 weeks I could feel full on kicking and moving around and unlike the girls, who I could SEE moving around at about 28 weeks, I have seen Chase moving since week 22! It's true, you really do see and feel things earlier each time! haha
The girls were pretty consistent with their kicking and location. Both girls stayed in the center of my belly area most of the time, only occasionally putting pressure on my spine and only towards the end. Chase, however, is ALL OVER THE PLACE, all the time! He kicks me in the back, the chest, straight down (oh ya, that one hurts ladies!), and pretty much anywhere he pleases!

Ultrasound

With both the girls, I had an ultrasound around 21 weeks and then had at least one after that. With Cadie, because of her/my condition, I had 2 ultrasounds a week for about 2 months to keep a close eye on her measurements. Both the girls were very proportioned looking. Their bodies seemed about the same from head to toe... Chase, on the other hand, appeared ALL LEGS in all his ultrasounds so far! No wonder his kicks make me shake sometimes with their intensity!

Cravings

My cravings haven't been near as intense with Chase as they were with the girls. With Ciara and Cadince I had hardcore cravings throughout the day and night all the way to about the 7 month mark. I wanted strange combinations of things, beef jerky all the time, pepsi circulated through my veins like blood, and if I didn't eat when and what I was craving then, I couldn't eat after. I practically lived off of Subway with Cadince! lol With Chase, I have had minimal cravings, mostly for full course meals like Fried Chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy (thanks Mom), steak and loaded mashed potatoes, salads and such... oh, and pistachios! haha! However, the weirdest craving I have had, through all the pregnancies has occurred with Chase only and is really abnormal to me... milk! I HATE milk so much! I barely use any in my cereal each morning, I would only drink it accompanied with Ovaltine mix, I wouldn't even drink it with oreos! Chase, on the other hand, LOVES milk and I have to have two or three glasses everyday! I never thought something I personally have such disdain for could become my new pepsi all because of the appetite of my child!

That's about all I've got right now... Which is quite alot I realize! haha! I hope to remember to update in the third trimester!

Our Little Man 9/25/09

Well, today is the 23 week mark... so... only 17 more weeks, give or take 2 or3, left before we see our little boy face to face... Since 17 sounds to much less than 20, this week is exciting! lol

Chase moves every which way every few seconds! I love this part! The kids get a "kick" out of feeling the baby "kick" (har har har!) and love to watch my stomach move up and down under my shirt when he is rolling around inside! Since it won't be much longer till everyone gets to see Chase in all his glory, I thought Iwould post a few ultrasound pictures up for everyone to see! Here he is!!!!
This is my favorite! The profile picture! You can see his little head, and his spine, his heart, stomach, and face! Makes me tear up!








In this one he has his mouth open towards the top there while he is yawning! If you look, you can see his little tongue right above his bottom jaw! Kinda scary looking, in a cute way! lol








If you are offended, I am sorry, but we are very proud of our priviledge to have a little boy and I just thought, for all those wondering if the results could have been wrong, that we would show that he is definitely a boy! These pics were taken at our sepcialists office so, I believe there is no denying it! haha!





Well, it has been quite beautiful outside and we have been spendingmore time at the park and playing outside because of it... As fun as it sounds, the outside world must not like me much! lol I noticed a few days ago, after hanging at the park, that my feet, ankles, and calves were sooooo swollen! I had never really had that problem before with the swelling until the last little bit of both my other pregnancies... so, at 5 months, experience this unsightly condition is less then fantastic to say the least! I can't get up and walk around for more then 10-15 minutes it seems without the swelling getting so bad my feet hurt, even in flip flops! Must be a boy thing!

That's about it I reckon! If any of you mom's have any advice it is appreciated... I will try almost anything right now! Not being active in these last few months could prove very bad later in weight perspective!

Update

Things are looking better, and prayers really do work! Chase appears to have clubbed feet srill and the doc feels it may be a neuro problem, we go back in 4 weeks to find out for sure... but, his heart looks great, no calcium deposits, and no surgery needed! His possible down syndrome has turned into likely false readings, as many said were possible... We aren't 100% in the clear yet, but the major worries we had have been lightened! Thank you all so much for your prayers!

Worries and Hopes

Week 22 has come with some hardships...
Monday I received a call from my doctor's office saying I needed to come in for an immediate appointment to discuss our ultrasound the previous Thursday. Such news is NEVER a good thing so Wednesday we headed over to see Dr. Lisa and the news was, as we expected, horrible.
Chase has some complications. There are calcium deposits in his heart that will likely have to be removed surgically shortly after he is born. Worse case scenario they will need to be removed immediately meaning they will operate on him while he is still in the womb. This of course bears a risk to both of us.
There are also a few markers in the ultrasound that indicate that he may have Down Syndrome. One of the indicators being the calcium deposits, as well as a few other issues. While the DS is not an immediate life or death issue, and Jared and I have both voiced how much we will love Chase no matter what, it is a health issue and the average life span of a child with DS is in the twenties.
The smallest issue that was found in the ultrasound was clubbed foot. This can be fixed immediately after birth with a simple reconstructive plastic surgery so that he will not be affected later on when he learns to walk.

This is increasingly hard to handle as my family is far away and the few friends I assumed I had have become more involved with themselves then with supporting me. I am in great need of a support system right now, and I feel a drain instead.

Friday we will be seeing a specialist in Nashville who will do hours of testing to determine the severity of it all. We may be blessed, as we have been before, and the more advanced testing may show that the indicators don't add up enough to mean DS, and the calcium deposits are minor and many be able to stay where they are without surgery and never affect our son. This of course, is what we are praying for...

Please, whether you ar religious or not, whether you have different views then we do, whatever your life morals are... please pray for us. Only the Lord can get us through this and only he can touch the life of my son and heal him. Financially this will be the hardest thing we have ver faced as well as the most emotional time of our lives... we need you, and so does Chase. Pray.
Thank you

Quick Update

We are at 21 weeks this week! Woo hoo! Just past the half-way point!


Well, here's the news, short and sweet but no less exciting!
We had our ultrasound yesterday.... It was agony having to wait to pee for so long.
Guess that's it...


Oh, and we are having a BOY!!!!!
uh huh! oh ya! whoop whoop!
Chace Everett Wayne Golson made his photographic debut! After 30 minuted of stubbornness he finally "showed himself" to the world.... Jared nearly fainted he was so nervous and then excited....
After 3 girls, the man NEEDED a son!

So, here comes the first little Golson boy to carry the name on.... Michael will finally have a boy cousin so he won't be all alone in the family! lol

The girls are thrilled, as are we of course.... and now, it's time for decorating... once we win the lottery of course!
If you want to come to the babyshower, please let me know!!! Send me your email address so I can send the invite out!!!!!! It will be October 24, Saturday, at 2:00pm!!!!


Yay! A boy!!!!!

That's all for now.
Oh, and we just moved into a new home so that's why I haven't been on lately... will post more later!