Calendar Pages

I made a few other digital pages to put on a calendar I am working on for my Grandmother for Christmas. I want to do one for my Pampaw in Ohio too, especially since Mom has been working on genealogy and we have TONS of pictures of all my extended family on that side. Anyhoo, these pages dont have much in common with the month they represent, just fun pages to look at really.

Thanks Juanita!

My Mother-in-law recommended to me a way to do my scrapbooking without making a giant mess all over the room and worrying about my kids eating random scrap pieces! She has been asking me and Andrea to try this digital scrapbooking program called My Digital Studio for awhile now and for my anniversary last month my husband went ahead and bought me the program and a few extras to play with it. Of course, right after that my computer went down for awhile so it has taken me a bit to get around to doing some pages. I was very excited about this program because recently, in May,we had quite a bit of horrible rain here and some flooding. We had a box downstairs full of some books we had packed away and one of them was Ciara's baby calendar that I wrote EVERY little detail down in. Practically every day had something written on it. Well, we got quite a bit of damage in the basement and along with about 6 boxes of clothes, the box of books was ruined. Molded and destroyed. I could deal with all the other books not making it, but my heart broke when I saw Ciara's book. I copied down what I could from the pages saved, but pretty much everything was lost. With My Digital Studio, I can make all my pages, keep all my pictures and memories up to date and protcted from ruin, and make them fun too! So, here are my first few projects. I am learning so dont judge me too hard. lol.








On this one I actually took a few pieces (different sized and shaped stamps) and put them together to make the little hummer type truck. Very intermediate at best, but I thought it turned out quite cute.




I made the syringe on this one with the same concept as the truck.














My first few pages were all Chase pages because those were my most recent photos. More everybody-else pages to come. lol

I plan on doing a page like this for all the girls. I am starting a baby-book/calendar type scrapbook for each kid as a timeline type thing.






Well, that's what I got for my regular pages. I will post some from the calendar I am working on for my Grandmother soon too.

Still No Pictures

Wow. I am officially blog-grounded I think. I have posted sparingly and insufficiently these past few months and added like 3 pictures total! To quote the typical teenager these days "OMG!"
Sorry!!!! lol

And still, I post without ANY pictures to post. Well, not that I dont have any to post, just that I havent gotten them on the computer yet.... mostly bc I am lazy, but also bc I cant find the darn memory card reader to transfer all 4000 of my pictures onto the computer. Lame.

Well, Cadince just turned 4 last week. FOUR!!! How did that happen?! It hit me hard too. One day I turned around and my tiny little bug was 4! In case you are wondering though, she is still tiny. LOL! She has grown so much in this past year and is such an amazing big sister. It is nice to have the days while the big girls are gone at school to hang out with Cadie and Chase and watch them together. She and I do some school stuff every week for our "at-home" daycare and she is SO SMART. She catches on so fast and she really loves to learn. Chase absolutely adores her and when they play together he laughs so hard. She gets down on the ground and they crawl around together across the livingroom. Lovin it.

Ciara is loving Kindergarten and making tons of friends. She has had one minor incident (stepped on a girls foot when she cut in line at the slide) and we had a talk but other than that she has integrated quite well. Her teacher is quite lovely and I feel very blessed she feels comfortable in school and isnt scared without me.... but it kinda hurts sometimes. She doesnt even look back anymore when she gets on the bus or worry about what I am doing while she is gone. She had to stay home today because she was sick and she cried so hard because she loves Kindergarten and didnt want to miss her teacher anymore. lol. I guess I should just be glad she likes it while it lasts... pretty soon she will be faking illnesses just to stay away from school.

Cecilia has been off to a rough start in 3rd grade. Somedays she does excellent and enjoys it and other days she is so absent-minded about what she is suppose to remember to do and bring home and such. I fear she may have some ADD because she can not stay focused on anything... except art and reading. She can zone out on anything when she is reading and drawing. She had saved up money from her good grades last year and she finally bought herself a really nice art set and sketch pad. She is pretty good and Jared (my own personal artist who hides his talent but is really really good) has been teaching her some concepts and having her sketch different things different ways. I love watching her mind open up and her imaginaiton come out on paper.

Chase is 8 months old now and getting too big lol. He just moved into a big boy carseat, no longer in the infant carrier. He is a super picky eater, not with food but with WHEN he wants to eat and how much at a time. Fristrating but at least he eats... he gets like that with breastfeeding too. That one can be more painful than frustrating sometimes. lol. He is crawling (still more army crawl then hands and knees crawl) all over the place and it has become a necessity to baby proof the livingroom and surrounding areas now... and he still manages to find cords and shoe laces to chew on. He is adorable when he sits up and plays but he just doesnt like to sit up lately. He locks his knees so they stay straight and helays or crawls bu hates to sit. Boys will be stubborn boys.

Jared and I are still waiting.... waiting for a new job (his orders are up in 2 weeks), waiting to move into our own place again, and waiting for the other ball to drop so it seems. Everyday is a challenge with little to no friends around, no one to talk to, and with the thought of unemployment being our only income scaring the living daylights out of us. So, everyday I wake up I find a new blessing to dwell on. Something special the Lord has given me to help me smile that day and to keep the walls from falling down on me. Somedays all it will be is finding out that the toe I stubbed earlier that hurts like hades isnt actually broken-just painful. Thats nice. lol. But its a blessing.

I encourage any of you that actually read my ramblings to find a blessing, something besides the obvious fact that you are alive and you have a family bc thats cheating. lol. Its a challenge... and make a list of them for one week.... your list might surprise you. I am challenging my kids to do the same thing too.... a good habit I think :)
May God Bless you all and continue to bless me in all the insane and simple ways he does so everyday.

I blame the Herpes!

Before I embellish let me first say that NO I do not have a STD nor does anyone in my family. lol. My computer got a virus (hence the herpes remark) and has been under the weather for 2 months before we could finally afford to get it in the shop and fixed (expensive!). I have had ti up and running for the past two weeks but about the time we got it home the internet rounter started acting up and now it is nearly impossible to keep a signal on my laptop long enough to do anything really. Mostly I jump on to pay bills and check the bank and read what I can to catch oup on everyone else but I never have the time to really post. Have no fear, I am gathering pictures and information from the past 2 months to post on as soon as we can get the internet working better and when I can have a minute to sit and post my many many make-up posts.

Quick update-- things are becoming more depressing these days around here. We are living iwth my parents to try and save up money to get a place since Jared's orders are up at the end of this month, but even though he has been applying for jobs since April at least 3-4 interviews a month all over the state of Tennessee from point to point- we have no new job in sight. This is making it hard because even though we have been putting some money aside, its not near enough to live off of and we are getting anxious to have our own home again. I desperately ask for prayers that something decent pop up soon, we arent being picky!
Ciara started Kindergarten a few weeks ago so it is just Cadie, Chase and me (and Grammy and Pappy) at home everyday so we have been working on some preschool stuff for her. We cant afford actual preschool and she didnt qualify as "needy" to get into any of the local preschool programs at the elementary schools so we are home-schooling for preschool. She is loving it and I am very proud of her accomplishments so far. Ciara is loving Kindergarten and learning lots already and I will add more to that later. Cecilia is in 3rd grade now and just got fitted fro glasses the other day so she is handling alot of changes and she is doing so very well I have to say. Chase is growing as babies do and is as spunky as the girls were. He has started army crawling all over the place and I am reminded how insane life gets when kids go through the crawling stage!! lol

Guess that's all I can do for now, kids to feed and a husband due home any moment. More to come promise.

Let It Out

Okay so lately I have been building on an issue, well alot of issues related to the same general issue, and I ave found a great deal of anger is inside of me. I am typically not the kind to get angry and stay that way. I fume to my husband about whatever bothers me, and then I am over it and (especially when it involves another person) I tend to ignore the fact that it ever happened. When a "friend" or someone offends me or upsets me, I vent and then I forget... no real anger issues here. However, there is one issue, one group of problems that keep occuring and keep frustrating me and I recently discovered that I am really upset about them. No matter how much I talk to Jared about it, pray, read through some scripture, or try to ignore it, the anger just keeps building up inside and I feel almost a violent rage towards this issue. The thing is, it's mostly centered around someone else, not me. Yes there are problems within this issue that concern me and those are upsetting, but mostly the anger I have is centered around the areas where this issue affects/concerns my husband.
I think I have learned that I am quite defensive when it comes to my other half. Jared and I may have our squabbles and bad days here and there, but ultimately he is the most important person in my life save my kids and I don't take too kindly to people disrespecting and slandering him.
Because of the sensitivity of this issue and those involved I dont want to come right out and say who and what (actually I do but the christian in me is keeping it under wraps for now for the sake of maturity and that whole turn the other cheek clause) but I just need to know the best way to get rid of this anger. Since I am not shown respect by those concerned in this issue, approaching them is not a viable solution, but I am afraid if I continue down this path of rage that it is going to end badly.... I need prayers please and suggestions if you have any. Mostly i think having someone to help with guidance would be nice but I am afraid my search for guidance would be considered more gossiping then counseling from a friend so I remain mute for now.
Guess this is the outcome of what the mind thinks of at 12am. I wasnt planning on going into this that much at all...
Also, while I am already driving down this road, as a parent anyone reading this, If someone were to hit your child- not spank their butts in a disciplinary way but actually hit them- an adult that is realted to you or your spouse, what is the best way to handle that? My first instinct is to rip their head off but I am, and only the Lord knows why, trying to avoid hurting anyone's feelings and causing even more family drama... but I do not feel right stepping aside and acting as if nothing happened for the sake of keeping everyone from being upset with me. Not like they aren't already? Is it ok to sacrifice that type of outburts, keep things under wraps and ignore it in order to please everyone else, when someone has harmed your child whether it was with harmful intent or not? I just need to know that I am not violent and crazy.

Well, on a lighter note Jared has lined up a few more interviews and we are praying for a notice soon on one of these jobs!! Living with my Mom and Dad is proving to be slightly stressful but overall not a bad experience so far! I think the fact that we have alot of love between us and all have a great relationship with the Lord really helps! That and my folks just LOVE spending time with their grandbabies! lol

Regrets

Let me first say I am not one to regret. I believe that life happens as we and the Lord above allow it to and that we should take everyday and every moment as meaningful no matter how crappy it turns out to be. However, these past few months with Chase have shown me that I do have regrets...
I regret that I didn't soak every moment up with Cadince when she was a baby. Things were so hectic with her premature birth, and Ciara was barely a year and a half old at the time, and I just didn't do much. We moved 2 months after she was born and then I started school. Looking back, there are less pictures of Cadie and I remember fewer things about her first year of life. It makes me cry now thinking about how I can barely picture her as a baby, her distinct features, her eating style or playfulness... it's mostly a blur. I don't know why. I know alot of people say that the majority of people dont document as much with their second child as they did with their first, and technically Cadince was my "second" child... but Chase is my "third" and I write down everything and take pictures all the time. I spend hours playing and snuggling with him everyday no matter how crazy life gets. I just womder if it's going to be evident one day in Cadie's life. If she will ever feel different. I spend tons of time with her now, cuddling and playing and such, and we are best buddies... but I can't help regret being a cruddy Mom when she was a baby. Don't get me wrong I loved her ddearly and I far from ignored her as an infant, but I didn't spend the same time invested in every thing she did as I did for Ciara and do for Chase...
One of those things I wish I could do over I guess....

Oh My Goodnesssssss!

So this is just going to be short for now. The past few weeks have been so CRAAAAAAZY! We started moving two weeks ago, packing and cleaning and such... abnd we are still trying to finish up moving! We have temporarily moved in with my Mom and Dad, bless them, while we organize things and try and save up money so when Jared gets new orders we can build a house. We are hoping to only be here with them for July and maybe August. Jared has had a few interviews for new full time active jobs, so we are just waiting on hearing from at least one of them with an offer! We REALLY want to move to the Smyrna area, where he already drills anyway. There are 2 jobs he has interviewed for there and one in Tullahoma.
Because of how busy we have been we havent had the opportunity to spend hardly ANY time with Andrea and the cousins while they were here to visit. The few days we have been available they have had other plans with the other half of the family and when they are free we seem to be up to our ears in packing and such and really dont have the time to take a break. We are hoping to make a trip to see them in a few months and hopefully that will mean we get some time with them just the kids hanging out. I am SO glad the kids love their cousins so much, just wish we had more opportunities to get them together.
I will put up some pictures and such and post some more info in a few days hopefully, just dont have much time these days!
On a side note, Cecilia left for church camp today!!! This will be her first time away from me for more than two-three nights and that was only bc I was in the hospital having a baby!!! I already miss her but I know she is going to have so much fun! Dropping her off today brought back a million memories of my camp days as a kid!
Please pray for her and for Jared's job opportunities! More later!

My Big Boy

Chase is growing so fast! It is hard to believe he is 5 months old already! Where has the time gone? That is almost 1/2 a year! He is sitting up with help now... (He is still a little top heavy lol)

I love watching him play with his toys! He grabs and chews (or I guess I should say gums) everything he can get his hands on and he gets so excited when he latches on to something new! This giraffe is his new best friend Goober the Giraffe. He is half toy, half teether with a bit of a rattle! Since Chase is starting to cut his first tooth (up top) he has grown quite attached to his "cool" friend! I guess G-O-O-B-E-R spells RELIEF for Chase!

Chase has got a new toy! He is definitely NOT a fan of tummy time for more than 5-10 minutes so I am pretty sure he will end up walking before he crawls. He loves to try to stand up and kick out his legs way more than laying down! Jared and I have been looking for both a door jumper and a Bumbo for Chase so he can practice sitting around and stretch his legs out alot too! We went to the local consignment store and there was this jumper! It was only $10!! What a steal! We brought it home and Chase has barely been out of the thing he loves it so much! Perfect buy!
Of course, after a hour or two of fun time play... well he needed a little nap! How cute!! He was so out of it I had to snap a picture before I could get him out! I am very happy he is enjoying his new toy!

During this point in my life I am very unhappy with my physical condition. I have a hard time dealing with my More-To-Love-Figure as everyone calls it, LOL. However, it is hard to not be happy to pose with this handsome little guy! I love him so much! Even though I get a bit stressed out here and there taking care of all 4 of my crazy bunches of excitement and preparing for our move in a few weeks... Chase relaxes me and I can never be angry or down when he is in my arms!

I am so blessed to have my kids! When I go to the store or park and women and men both look at me like I am insane or trashy almost because of all my kiddos! I know that each time I have gotten pregnant it has been a bit of a surprise to each and every one I have told and people began to wonder how I can survive with all of them! I just have to say --- I can survive because with all those kids comes all that love!! No matter how I feel about myself any day of any week my kids coming up to me, hugging me, and telling me how I am their best friend and favorite person in the world... well it makes it all ok!

Physicals and Shots... OH NO!!!

Poor Ciara and Cadince had to get their shots updated this week. Plus, Ciara--my big girl--starts Kindergarten in 2 months! Oh my goodness!! Anyway, they were very brave at first... then they started to freak out once they had to change into these paper gowns and wait for the doctor! Cadie was first to get her shots and she got 4!!! She screamed and cried and turned red and it was all I could do not to pick her up and hold her after the first one! Then it was Ciara's turn and she bravely scooted to the end of the table ready for her shots. They told her she would be getting 2.... no biggie compared to what Cadie had just gone through... Until the doctor pinned her down and gave her SIX!!! She screamed so loud I am sure the whole doctors office heard her! She was in pain and she was in traumatic shock from being lied to and poked way more than she was promised! I wanted to rip the nurse's head off! How could she lie to my baby like that? I had to hold Ciara for over 15 minutes before she would even let go of me to get dressed and she was still traumatized the rest of the day! Thank the Lord that she doesnt need anymore shots till she is 11!

We Love the Summer!!!

Sometimes this blogger can be so crazy! No matter how I place these photos they come out crazy crooked! lol

Anyway... We have been looking forward to summer and now that it is here we are enjoying the wet-side of the season! We got little pools for the kids-- one for the girls and an inflatable shaded one for Chase and me. We set them up at Grammy and Pappy's house and had a blast!!! Even Chase enjoyed splashing in the water and playing with the beach ball. We have been going to the sprinkle park on post alot lately-- yet I never take pictures! Oops! Probably because I am wet from running around in the water with the kids! lol